5 Signs You May Need to Work on Your Relationship with Your Body
We all have bodies, but how can someone know if they have a good relationship with their body? Body image is complex because it can shift based on how society views beauty and bodies, along with how we feel about them as individuals.
Our feelings about our bodies are often based in the beliefs we’ve been taught over the course of our lives, continuously interacting with the intersection of identities we sit in. In this post we will identify and discuss five signs that you may need to work on your relationship with your body.
Sign #1: You have trouble looking at yourself in the mirror
Remember that scene in Mean Girls when all the girls are pointing out what they dislike about their bodies? It’s extremely common in our society to speak negatively about our appearance while looking in the mirror, but that does not mean it is healthy for your relationship with your body.
The experience of looking at oneself in the mirror should be neutral or positive overall. If you find yourself intentionally avoiding your reflection or feeling negatively about your body when you look in the mirror, it may be a sign that you need to work on your relationship with your body and that there’s room to experience a more neutral or positive relationship with your body.
Sign #2: You feel guilty for eating certain foods
A lot of folks believe some foods are “good” for you, while other foods are “bad” for you. A weight-inclusive or weight-neutral nutrition framework teaches us that while some foods are more nutrient dense than others, no individual food item is “good” or “bad”.
The experience of feeling guilty for eating (or not eating) certain foods may be a sign that you can experience more neutrality around your relationship to your body and food. We can and should include gentle nutrition in our diets, but that should be informed by all of our social determinants of health.
Sign #3: You feel guilt for not exercising
As a certified personal trainer, I love to see folks have a great relationship with movement, but there’s never a reason to feel guilty if you’re unable to exercise. Yes, exercise is important for our general health, but we should not feel guilt when we are unable to exercise.
The experience of feeling guilt for not exercising may be a sign that you need to work on your relationship with your body and movement. Similarly to nutrition, we can and should include movement we enjoy in our lives, but it should also be informed by all of our social determinants of health.
Sign #4: You worry about your body changing, especially the thought of it looking older or being bigger.
From the day we’re conceived until the day we leave this earth, our bodies will grow and change. We are in constant evolution yet, our society often expects folks to freeze from our teenage years on and then we’re suddenly allowed to look our age again once we’re deemed elderly. This ignores the simple fact that bodies will change and are meant to as we age.
Outside of that fact, they often change as our social determinants of health change. The experience of feeling worried about your body changing, especially the thought of it looking older or being bigger, may be a sign that you need to work on your relationship with your body and that it’s possible to unlearn unhealthy expectations of our own and others’ bodies.
Sign #5: You find yourself judging other people's bodies
We have been taught to judge each other, especially bodies and appearance, but that doesn’t mean it’s right. Oftentimes, folks who experience body dysmorphic disorder report previously being bullied for their appearance.
The experience of judging other people’s bodies is often a reflection of how we hope our bodies can look or what we hope they don’t eventually look like. Either way, it creates a narrative that often is based on unrealistic expectations and may be a sign that you need to work on your relationship with your body.
Getting Support
None of these behaviors are inherently concerning or harmful, but it is important to understand why we repeat behaviors and how those behaviors can impact our mental health.
The relationship we have with our bodies is ever-changing and is informed not only by internal factors but by societal ones. It’s important to unlearn unhelpful and unhealthy ways of operating and to nurture this relationship the same way we would with the folks we respect and love.
If you relate to any of these signs, support is available. Our whole team is weight-inclusive, fat-positive, and body image/eating disorder informed.
Ashantis and Casey both specialize in supporting folks anywhere on their journey with body image, food, and movement, whether you relate to some of these signs or know you’re experiencing intense symptoms.
Reach out for a complimentary consultation call if you’re interested in support.
